on painting flowers instead.

sometimes i think about the amount of horror and violence to which one can be exposed at second-hand, to which one can bear witness, in an average day; and i feel very overwhelmed. sometimes i think about the ways in which the operation of social media reduces all of us to characters, a spectacle to consume at a distance which is always critical, and i want to weep. sometimes i think about what shulamith firestone wrote to her sister in 1970:

“basically, I don’t believe finally that the revolution is so imminent that it’s worth tampering with my whole psychological structure”

i think about the ways we can act to open up or close off possibility for one another; about how “power is everywhere because it comes from everywhere” (foucault); and about whether it’s even possible to live gently in such violent times. i think about my faults and my failures and my not-measuring-up; i think about every misplaced step i’ve ever made. it’s a lot to think about.

hut then, also, at the same time, the rain falls with a softness that is almost melodic. something like a raindrop breaks the surface of my thought (which is like a murky pool, thick and stagnant). i pour water, mix colour. i paint a flower, petal by petal. i suppose that this is how a life is made.

A watercolour painting of some anemones, in shades of lilac, soft blue, and peachy rose. Their petals are transparent, and their stems curve and wobble, as though they're blown in a gentle breeze.

“so much for ‘a kinder, gentler politics’” (notes on radical kindness)

A problem: how to negotiate a belief in love, in kindness, in unmaking this violent world so that gentleness can bloom, when injustice continues to be done? Or, more precisely: what happens when the practice of transformative justice fails? What happens when somebody’s behaviour is genuinely harmful, when they’re unwilling to acknowledge the harms they’ve done, and when neither they nor their friends are willing to engage in any sort of transformative justice process?

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the first warm day.

It feels strange to say it in the midst of a global pandemic, but this is the calmest and least anxious I’ve felt since I moved to London a year ago. The skies are silent: no traffic noise, no endless stifling hum of planes… There is space for soft attention, for gentleness; for sleeping and for sharing and for dreaming kinds of living that might always feel like this.

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call for submissions.

I’m starting up my very very small press, peach-tree, pear-tree press, again after many years of dormancy! I want to experiment with publishing work by other writers, artists, & thinkers as well as my own. And so, I’m seeking submissions.

If you have writing, artwork, or an idea that you think would work well as a pamphlet/zine/small book, fill in the form on the contact page and tell me about it! All forms considered: fiction, theory, essay, polemic, translation, reflection, illustration, collage, poetry, comix, photography, hybrid forms, etc. Interests include (but aren’t limited to) radical politics, philosophy, ecologies, experimental/hybrid writing, architecture & the lived, music and other cultural criticism, and so much more.

Who can submit? Everybody is welcome! I’m especially interested in submissions from working class people (especially working class women/non-men), trans people of all genders, neurodiverse people, people with disabilities/, non-white people (especially Black and Indigenous people), and all intersections of the above—basically anybody who might struggle to be heard above the clamour of people whose confidence is supported and encouraged by the present social order. But if that’s not you and you have work yr really excited about, please do get in touch.

Money stuff: Currently a 60/40 split (60 for you, 40 for the press). As things get more sustainable (hopefully!), I’ll be able to explore better fee/payment structures.